photofrom 2011 …
this site is intended for my amusement and possibly yours, too.  i didn’t really consider myself old, but every day my body is telling me, “GIVE ME A BREAK”.  i am out of shape.  i was always a jock-wanna-be, but used every excuse to skip work outs or watch my weight. now i find myself about to turn 46 and packing 255 pounds on a 5′ 6″ frame.  i AM big-boned, but i’ve also got a layer or two of thick “insulation” covering my body, too.  they say you can’t laugh at others unless you can first laugh at yourself.  and so this site is designed for just that … a little bit of self-deprecating humor while taking you through my struggles to get in shape and become a ninja in the process.feel free to laugh, comment, and come back often.
— chunky ninja (july 12, 2011)

  • november 11, 2010 — first kenpo class
  • july 28, 2011 — promoted to yellow belt
  • april 26, 2012 — promoted to orange belt
  • october 18, 2012 — promoted to purple belt
  • july 11, 2013 — promoted to blue belt
  • june 25, 2015 — promoted to green belt


the very first tweet from chunky_ninja:
“i’m a lowly white belt. we all start here. the major difference is i’m 45 years old and horribly out of shape. but i’m determined.”

The Kenpo Creed

“I come to you with only karate, empty hands. I have no weapons, but should I be forced to defend myself, my principles or my honor; should it be a matter of life or death, of right or wrong; then here are my weapons, karate, my empty hands.”

—Ed Parker – March, 1957


My Kenpo Lineage
Ed Parker, Sr.,
10th degree, SGMA

Tommy Burks,
8th degree,
Assoc Master of the Arts

David Jenkins,
6th degree,


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Read the old posts and see how this all started!

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